where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Friday, May 20th, 2011
show: 12:01 a.m.
costs: $13.75 Ticket + $5.50 small Popcorn w/ Butter + $4.50 medium Diet/Zero ( w/ Barq's & Cherry flavors ) Coke = $23.75
auditorium: 8, with the 3-D screen
seat: 5th row, 8th column
2nd time
where: EDWARDS FAIRFIELD STADIUM 16 & I-MAX in Fairfield, CA
when: Monday, May 23rd, 2011
show: 12:50 p.m.
costs: $17.50 Ticket + $6.00 small Popcorn + $1.00 3.1 oz. Peanut Butter Cookie Dough Bites ( bought at 99-Cent Only Store and smuggled-in ) + $0.00 small Diet Coke ( Free on Regal Crown Club rewards card ) = $24.50
auditorium: 12, with the I-Max screen
seat: 5th row, 6th seat
synopsis/overview: Captain Jack Sparrow ( Johnny Depp ) sets his compass on a new quest: The search for the fabled Fountain of Youth.
noteworthy scenes: 1.) The fishermen; 2.) Trial; 3.) Short trip; 4.) "There should be a captain in there somewhere"; 5.) The privateer, Hector Barbossa ( Geoffrey Rush ); 6.) "Does this face look like it has been to the Fountain of Youth"; 7.) Sword fight; 8.) "I mistook it for a brothel"; 9.) Trap-door; 10.) The map; 11.) Queen Anne's Revenge"; 12.) Zombiefied; 13.) Angelica ( Penelope Cruz ), the daughter; 14.) Prophecy; 15.) "The fountain be the prize"; 16.) Mutiny; 17.) Blackbeard ( Ian McShane ); 18.) "I can name fingers and point names"; 19.) "Pray he be delivered from evil"; 20.) Voodoo doll; 21.) "Are we not King's men"; 22.) The profane ritual; 23.) "You lied to me by telling me the truth"; 24.) Mermaid hunting; 25.) "I'm in love"; 26.) The glass coffin; 27.) The jump; 28.) Hobby; 29.) "You will walk"; 30.) "You pushed me down out of the way"; 31.) Rocks; 32.) "You stole my map"; 33.) "We need but one tear"; 34.) "There's a girl, female, of the opposite sex"; 35.) "You don't have termites, do you"; 36.) "Your sword smells funny"; 37.) "Tears of joy"; 38.) "I want one of those"; 39.) "I survived"; 40.) "Can we have a drink"; 41.) Water droplet; 42.) Stalactite; 43.) "Aqua de Vida"; 44.) Secret cavern; 45.) "One-legged man"; 46.) Fight; 47.) "Only God can grant Eternal Life"; 48.) "Venomous advantage"; 49.) "Do not waste my tear"; 50.) "I can't save you both"; 51.) "Forgive me"; 52.) "I hate you"; 53.) "I've actually never been that drunk"; 54.) "I gotta go"; 55.) Feast your eyes"; 56.) "I know a man with a goat"; 57.) "It's the pirate's life for me"; and 58.) Bonus Scene after the Ending Credits.
audience reaction: The audience enjoyed this. Some people in the audience gave it a "Hands Clapper" ending.
2nd audience reaction: The audience this time around was not as lively and/or as responsive as the midnight show audience. But they still liked this movie.
recommendation: I liked it. Go see this movie.
spoiler alert! So that old cast-away man just happened to be underwater all that time. Sure .... And how come none of the fish in the net flopped around? If you're gonna bribe a judge, a lawyer or a juror, in front of everyone while the court is in session is not the place to do it! How did news of the find travel to England so fast when the distance between Spain and England is almost 800 miles? When that sliced, cream-filled puffed pastry got stuck up on the chandelier, half of it should have fallen down. How did the charcoal catch on fire really fast? And where can I buy such charcoal for my barbecue party? When they escaped through the trap-door, why didn't the soldiers shoot at them? The trident mark carved onto Jack Sparrow's chest didn't bleed. What happened to all of the mermen? Maybe the mermen were attending mass at the Church of the Latter Day Sands. ( I know it's a stupid pun. But that's what makes a pun fun. ) You call those, "Mermaids"? They were more like vampires with scales and fins! I guess mermaids don't like to eat zombies--they prefer "fresh meat". Ha, ha, ha. As their shipmates were being eaten alive by the mermaids and their ship being sunk, the men onshore just went about their business like nothing serious was happening to their fellow crew--bad directing and bad acting! Wouldn't it have been better, for transport, to have the glass coffin set in a cart? If you remember well the first installment in this franchise, there is a "Wet T-Shirt" scene in it. But this fourth installment doesn't have such a scene--bummer! Those pirates had been out at sea for a considerably long time away from the company of "accommodating" women; so, don't tell me that not one of them volunteered to stay behind and "guard" the sexually-compromised mermaid whose hands were tied above her head and who was wearing nothing but an unbuttoned wet shirt--bad directing. Yup! Hey, who took-off the mermaid's shirt? I'm just asking because I didn't see it happen--no one did! I want the director, Gore Verbinski, back at the helm for part 5! ( "Remove, please ...." Remember this line? ) There was no way for him to have climbed up on top of the coconut tree because the fronds would have kept his rope-bound body from doing so. He would have to free himself of his bondage, first, before he could start climbing to the top of the tree; but it wasn't shown how he got out of bondage. The cut on Angelica's palm wasn't bloody enough. That skeletal arm somehow held itself steady at a "right angle" to the swirling mass of water--B.S.! And the water didn't even splash away from the skeletal arm--it was just deflected. And a skeletal arm should not be able to move since it has no muscles to move itself with! Why didn't Angelica run to the rowboat alongside Jack? What was to keep her from doing so? Juan Ponce de Leon was hit by a poisoned arrow in a battle with the natives of Florida. De Leon was taken back to Cuba where he died of his wound in July of 1521.
fyi: If you think hard about it, you'll come to the conclusion that the "fountain of youth" is nothing more than just a splashy euphemism for a young virile male's ability to copiously orgasm. In other words, it was perceived to be a cure for impotence.
If you "can't get it up any longer", you probably have arterial blockages. I guess my arteries are clog-free after all.
Saint Augustine, Florida, is where you'll find the Fountain of Youth National Archaeological Park. And, no, its water won't make you young and/or cure you of your impotence. ( 'Sorry to disappoint you. ) It was so named because it is widely believed that it was in that area that the conquistador Juan Ponce de Leon, who legend claims went in search of the Fountain of Youth, discovered Florida.
Do these mermaids smell like tuna? I.y.k.w.i.m. ( if you know what I mean )--wink, wink.
I was gonna ask, How come these mermaids don't have breasts? But, then, I remembered that I've never seen breasts on whales, either, even though they're mammals! I hate it sometimes when I know that I'm right about something.
I honestly thought that Syrena was played by Ellen Page because the preview for this movie showed the girl ( Astrid Berges-Frisbey ) with a very striking resemblance to her.
word of advice: If you swear-off food, you'll get hungry. Likewise, if you swear-off sex, you'll get horny--and there's Your Impotence Cure! I just saved you a trip to the doctor's office. What do you think ...?
tidbits: Because of the length of this movie, I just decided to see it here in Vallejo instead of in Fairfield ( where I usually go for midnight shows ).
A man went to his doctor for his annual physical examination. When he returned home, his wife was surprised to see him wearing a very nice and very expensive suit, as well as a fancy pair of shoes. The wife asked, "Why are you dressed in such a way?" And he said, "Because the doctor said that I'm a very impotent man."
2nd tidbits: I took my white Geo Metro to Broadway Auto Body Shop first thing this morning to get an estimate for the repair work. It will be $250.oo out of my own pocket to pay for some bitch's driving incompetence and irresponsibility! I'll go to Oakland, CA, on Wednesday to see if I can get her to admit responsibility. Otherwise, something bad might happen to the bitch's black SUV--and there will be nobody around to witness it happen! Just like nobody saw the hit-and-run done to my car.
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