where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Tuesday, January 31st, 2012
show: 9:40 p.m.
costs: $9.75 Ticket + $4.75 Pretzel Bites + $4.00 small Diet/Zero ( w/ Barq's & Cherry flavor ) Coke + $5.89 # 11 Filet-o-Fish Comb Meal w/ medium Sweet Tea @ the Target Shopping Center MacDonald's Restaurant before the show = $24.39
auditorium: 11
seat: 4th row, 7th column
synopsis/overview: Stephanie Plum ( Katherine Heigl ) has been out of a job for six months and, desperate for some quick and easy money, she convinces her sleaze-ball cousin to hire her as a recovery agent/ bounty hunter at his bail bonds company. The biggest ticket at which is the one on her former high school boyfriend. But Stephanie soon realizes that this case is not "air-tight" and the reward money will not be so quick and easy.
noteworthy scenes: 1.) Dinner; 2.) Figure of speech; 3.) Chatty; 4.) Grudge; 5.) The hide-out; 6.) Trick; 7.) "You smell like a dumpster"; 8.) "Trying to diversify"; 9.) Hydra-Shok bullet; 10.) Gym; 11.) Rapist; 12.) Dinner date; 13.) 'Phone call; 14.) "I need money"; 15.) Exhibitionist; 16.) "Honey, half the women in Jersey sold him their Cannoli"; 17.) Master Fuse; 18.) Shower; 19.) Scene of the crime; 20.) Witness; 21.) "One hundred twenty-five pounds of angry woman"; 22.) Ice cold; 23.) Hospital; 24.) "Now, it's personal"; 25.) "I need your help"; 26.) "Best option"; 27.) Rival; 28.) "You want it bagged"; 29.) "One mile, tops"; 30.) Sal's Meats; 31.) Sal's Gal; 32.) Fight; 33.) Taped confession; 34.) Acknowledgement; and 35.) Cupcake.
audience reaction: It was not that well-received by the audience since it came across as rather lame.
recommendation: This Comedy/Action Movie is not well-scripted, not well-acted and certainly not well-directed. I could have done a better job of directing this pedestrian effort. Wait for this to come out as a rental.
spoiler alert! Bounty hunting is a dangerous job. So, why didn't they give her some preliminary training before setting her loose on the hunt? If Ranger ( Daniel Sunjata ) was the best in the business, why did the job of hunting down Joseph Morelli ( Jason O'Mara ) given to Morty Beyers ( Fisher Stevens ), instead? Why wasn't the sparring match in the octagon monitored by a referee or a trainer? Why didn't anybody in the gym notice the bad guy manhandling her in the octagon? Her driver's side door was smashed; but, when she drove off, her window looked completely rolled down and there were no pieces of glass on the ground at all. I've seen more than enough cars with their side windows smashed--including mine--to know that pieces of broken glass will always be on the ground directly below such a broken car window. The bullet could have easily shot through that roasted chicken! She was handcuffed to a shower curtain rod--A SHOWER CURTAIN ROD!!! And shower curtain rods are held in place only by spring tension and by a screw adjustment. In other words, she didn't need to call anyone to free her from such a predicament because she could have easily freed herself. ( Please don't tell me that there is a "Dumb Blonde" joke subtly worked into that Handcuff scene. Because she's not blonde in this movie! Ha, ha, ha. ) Did she really have to take the shower curtain off the curtain rod? And how come her shower curtain didn't have a curtain liner? By gosh, I could easily make-out the outline of her right breast's areola--not that I'm complaining, mind you. Why did the rival bounty hunter say, "F--k God"? It was a stupid and senseless exclamation. "F--k you" would have made more sense to use in that scene. The bad guys could have easily disposed of that body since one of them was in a particular kind of business ( "Mystery Meat", anyone ...? ). Why didn't she give him the truck's license plate number and description? When they were at the boat dock, it got dark all of a sudden. For someone who just got shot in the butt, she sure could walk okay.
fyi: I know someone who had Lap Band surgery for weight loss. According to this person, a normal stomach is the size of a football. But with such a surgical procedure, the stomach's capacity is reduced to a size smaller than that of a tennis ball. And said person has to eat six small meals, and take a therapeutic multi-vitamin/mineral supplement, each day.
Okay, I already take a multi-vitamin/mineral supplement each and every day. So, I'm good on that. I just have to stop eating two football-sized servings of food whenever I'm pigging-out at a buffet. But, seriously though, despite the fact that I pig-out at buffets every week, I am actually losing my abdominal fat--AND I HAVE TO PIG-OUT ONCE OR TWICE EACH WEEK SO I DON'T LOSE TOO MUCH WEIGHT ( and too much fat ) TOO FAST AND END-UP JUST STRAINING MY HEART AND MAKING MY SKIN LOOSE AND SAGGY! With my abdominal fat shrinking fast, I can just say, Goodbye, to my "Love Handles" because it's getting so that there is less and less about me to love. Boo-hoo, woe is me ....
What, Katherine Heigl ... nude?!?!?! How could I miss that?!?!?! I must have blinked at the WRONG time--I was startled in my seat because of it. I'm losing my touch! It comes with age, I guess .... Ha, ha, ha.
word of advice: Know what you are trying to get yourself into before you accept a job offer.
tidbits: I had just eaten dinner at MacDonald's and swore to myself that I would not buy any snacks at the concession counter. But when I saw that last snack tray of Pretzel Bites laden with an extra helping of pretzels ( it was practically twice the usual serving )--I couldn't resist buying it just because!
By the way, in my Cebuano language, a true native would pronounce "Filet of Fish" as: Pee-let op Piss. Ha, ha, ha--snort! Hey, don't be laughing at my people's native accent. What's the matter with you ...?
After the movie, I went to the Super Wal-Mart in American Canyon, CA, to buy a multi-pack of Charmin Basic Bathroom Tissue, single ply ( Wal-Mart and Target are the only stores in the area that I know of which carry this particular kind )--the only type of bathroom tissue that touches my own butt at home!
I also bought a loaf of bread, five bananas, and two 2-litre bottles of soda: Sparkling Strawberry Lemonade and Diet Twist-Up Lemon-Lime.
It was already past midnight when I was done with my shopping, and a new day ( Wednesday )--and a new month ( February )--had just begun.
On my way home while driving down Sonoma Boulevard, as soon as I passed the Highway 37 over-pass around 12:32 a.m. or 12:33 a.m., I saw a shooting star blazed an amber streak down the horizon in front of my car. It was visible for just a fraction of a second. Where were my lightning-quick ocular reflexes a few hours ago when I needed their help to "review" a critical ( Shower ) scene in the movie ...? Ha, ha, ha.
Once I got home, I proceeded to make myself a tall glass of Safeway Select Key Lime Pie Ice Cream and Diet Twist-Up Lemon-Lime Float. Hmm ... yummy.
Then, I made myself a tall glass of Safeway Select Strawberry Shortbread Cookie Ice Cream and Sparkling Strawberry Lemonade Float. 'Not so yummy ....
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