NEW YEAR'S EVE, PG-13 ( 1 hr & 57 )

Quickie Review:  On New Year's Eve, people gather at Time's Square in New York City to ring in the New Year of New Beginnings as lost loves, dashed hopes and broken promises get their second chances on the most eagerly anticipated night of the year.

The audience was entertained by this Chick Flick.

I liked it enough, although it tended to be corny at times.  Go see this if you like Chick Flicks because this is definitely one such movie.

Here are the things that I found wrong in this movie:  Ingrid ( Michelle Pfeiffer ) rode the scooter side-saddle in her first scooter scene; she rode it astride in her second scooter scene; and she was back to side-saddle style in her third scooter scene.  Why ...?  Police officer Brendan's ( Chris "Ludacris" Bridges ) kids didn't look excited enough at the prospect of spending New Year's Eve with him!  If I win a contest fair and square, there ain't no way that I'm handing my win over to the other guy.  Sam's ( Josh Duhamel ) "mystery woman" was a major puke-inducing let-down ( if you ask me )!

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Watching this movie made me realize that one of my co-workers bears a resemblance to Katherine Heigl.

I waited until December 30th to watch this movie at it's last evening show, the 10:30 p.m. one, because I wanted it to be New Year's Eve day when I stepped out of the theatre.  I originally had it in mind to watch this tonight, December 31st,  at 10:30 p.m.; but I changed my mind because I have to go to work early tomorrow, a Sunday, January 1st; and I wanted to blog about this movie on the last day of 2011.

"Happy New Year To All Of You Out There!!!"
( Although celebrating the New Year in the dead of Winter instead of in the Spring doesn't make sense to me at all--it's all a Roman Catholic "thing", you see .... Whatever ....  Anyway ... have fun and be safe out there! )

WAR HORSE, PG-13 ( 2 hr & 26 min )

A LOVE STORY BETWEEN A BOY AND HIS HORSE

Quickie Review:  The advent of World War One forcefully separates a British farm boy from his horse.  Through the course of the war, the horse changes "ownership" until Fate reunites the two of them near the war's end.

The audience liked this movie.  And it got a "Hands Clapper" ending.

I liked this movie, too, especially the Wire Cutters scene.  Go see this movie if you're into Inspirational Dramas.  But it was an emotionally Sad & Sweet experience for me.  Many of the characters that I rooted for met their untimely deaths--such is the reality of war:  "The war takes everything from everyone."

Here are the things that I found wrong in this movie:  Mind you, these have less to do with the script writer or the director, but they  have a lot to do with antiquated/ineffective battle plans and strategies that were hard-headedly used for centuries!  The Cavalry Charge, with sabers drawn, was practically invented thousands of years ago and is of no use in today's battlefields.  In fact, it became ineffective shortly after Rifles and Cannons were invented.  And even more so when Explosives ( i.e. Dynamite and Grenades ) and Machine Guns came into use.  Do you remember Tom Cruise's THE LAST SAMURAI ( 2003 )?  

If I were the British officer in charged of that surprise attack on the Germans, I would have employed the primary use of the Infantry in concealment, with well-placed Snipers for support; and I would have used the Cavalry--with pistols drawn, not sabers--to flank the enemy.  It looked to me like those German machine gunners didn't use their machine guns in a sweeping motion.  The Cavalry officers just went past  the machine gunners when they could have struck them with their sabers or had their horses trample them to death.

WE BOUGHT A ZOO, PG ( 2 hr & 4 min )

Quickie Review:  After the death of his wife, Benjamin Mee ( Matt Damon ), a journalist, quits his job and relocates his little family out of town and onto  an 18-acre farm property that includes a recently-closed zoo.  A small zoo staff, run by Kelly Foster ( Scarlett Johansson ), cares for the menagerie.  Knowing full well that if the zoo is not opened many of its animals will be euthanized, Ben puts in his time and money into renovating the zoo and opening it to the public once again.

The audience liked this movie, especially the little brats.  But it didn't get a "Hands Clapper" ending.

I liked this movie, too.  It's a good Family Movie, if you don't mind the foul language.

Here are the things that  I found wrong about this movie.  Although this movie is based on a true story about the Mee family in England, the setting ( as well as the zoo's name ) was changed.  Why, is it because the main characters in this movie couldn't learn the British accent well enough before production began?  Well, if that was the problem, couldn't they just have hired British actors, instead?  I mean, come on ....  And the real zoo, Dartmoor Wildlife Park, was only closed for about 15 months, not years.  All that time spent on renovation and bringing the whole place up to code and nobody bothered to repaint the signs at each enclosure.  Whoever installed the doorknobs on the Big Cat enclosures sure didn't have the foresight or common sense to have repair work accessible only on the outside!  Duh ....

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I read an article years ago that says all Big Cats kept in captivity die of Kidney Failure.  Imagine that.  These felines are carnivores, and have been so for tens of millions of years.  Yet, they die of Kidney Failure.

As an aside, native Eskimos mostly subsist on a High-Fat, High Protein diet and they, too, succumb early to Kidney Failure before they can live long enough to get their Arteries clogged with Cholesterol!

Well, so much for the High-Fat, High Protein Diet!

THE DARKEST HOUR 3-D, PG-13 ( 1 hr & 29 min )

Quickie Review:  Two American entrepreneurial friends are in Moscow on a business trip.  While there, they hook-up with a couple of female American tourists at a night club just as the whole world is being invaded by power-hungry near-invisible aliens who have no qualms about disintegrating any living thing that comes in their way.  Somehow surviving the initial attack, the group emerge from hiding days later to find and join with other survivors to fight the deadly alien threat.

The audience somewhat liked it.

It was just okay to me.

Here are the things that I found wrong in this movie:  If everybody felt like it was the end of the world and I came upon the guy who stole my business idea, I'd kill him right there and then!  After all, who'll be there to arrest me and put me in jail?  That dead guy's body that they wrapped in Saran Wrap should have been bloated after two days' time!  The guys emerged out of hiding without any facial hair at all even though they had no access to razor blades and shaving cream! The plane that crashed through the wall of that shopping center still had its nose in perfect shape.  Obviously, the aliens cannot see through glass; BUT their human targets don't have sharply-delineated energy fields--they glow.  So ... if a human hides behind a glass shield, the human's energy field will still radiate a glow in much the same way that a light bulb will glow and give away its location even if it is hidden behind a solid, opaque object!  Before that alien disintegrated the dog, it was far enough away to have been able to see the area underneath the patrol car and would have--should have--noticed the two guys's energy fields!  I guess these aliens don't have the presence of mind to turn their heads and look at what's behind them!  And speaking of the patrol car and the human energy field, the four of them could just have hopped into a car and driven away with the glass windows rolled-up and not be seen by any of the aliens!  How long did that electrician take to turn his apartment into a "Faraday Cage" since he obviously had to go around town to scrounge for parts and supplies?  The aliens' energy fields can make lights turn on, can make windshield wipers turn on and can make a drained car battery charge-up BUT it cannot charge the battery pack of the Microwave Projector Rifle???  Why did the girl swim to shore when the submarine that they went looking for was RIGHT THERE???  Why did all of their cellphones give-off ring tones  even though they couldn't tell whether the 'phones were off or on since they were all without charge and had no reception at all, to begin with?  And who would be calling all of their cellphones at that ungodly time???  AND ... instead of coming down to the ground to harvest energy, the aliens could just have stayed in the clouds since lightnings are generated in the clouds over 8 1/2 million times PER DAY!!!  Ha, ha, ha.

P.S.  I hope that that poor  little ol' kitty got out of there okay ....

THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO ( 2011 ), R ( 2 hr & 38 min )

Quickie Review:  A disgraced journalist and a computer hacker team-up to uncover the 40-year mystery of a missing girl born into a very wealthy family.

The audience liked this movie.

I liked this movie, too, because my prayer to the god of Hollywood Movies was answered:  This girl is better looking and has firmer breasts than the original girl in the Swedish version.  There is a god after all--Yup!

Here are what I didn't like about this movie:  The first time that we see Lisbeth Salander ( Rooney Mara ) is when she gets off her bike and takes off her motorcycle helmet to reveal a perfectly-shaped Mohawk--Hah!  And what is a Swedish movie without Swedish Meatballs?  It borders on sacrilege, that is what it is!  Although this remake is very much the same as the original Swedish version which was shown in May and June of last year ( re-read my blog on it ), some scenes were replaced while others were altered.  But I don't want to mention said scenes in particular since doing so might just spoil it for some of you out there.  Go see the movie ....

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE--GHOST PROTOCOL, PG-13 ( 2 hr & 13 min )

Quickie Review:  The MI Team gets blamed for a "terrorist attack" on the Kremlin.  They go undercover to try and clear their reputation.  And, at the same time, bring the guilty party to justice.

The audience liked this movie.  But it didn't get a "Hands Clapper" ending.

I liked this movie, too.  And I believe that this is better than any of the other three Mission: Impossible movies.

Here are the things that I found wrong in this movie:  For that "invisible wall" camouflage to work properly, its sides would have to be set flushed against the floor, ceiling and walls; but doing so would give off a scarping and/or rubbing noise as the "invisible wall" is moved, thereby spoiling the effect!  When they were underwater, they could have used the air from the tires for breathing.  If the in-eye camera can take pictures which are perfect copies that are scrambled, why was the Launch Code reader unable to detect the discrepancy? Wow, it was just "amazing" how those two vehicles could go travelling around town at high speeds IN A SAND STORM  and not have their air intake ducts get clogged-up with sand!

ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: CHIPWRECKED, G ( 1 hr & 27 min )

Quickie Review:  Alvin and the Chipmunks and the Chipettes, along with their human, are on a cruise ship on their way to the International Music Awards.  But fun-loving Alvin manages to get them all overboard and washed-up on a seemingly deserted remote island.

The audience seemed to like this movie.

I was mildly entertained by it.  I would have enjoyed it more if Alvin wasn't such a little brat, no doubt about it.  But I liked how one character in this movie earned himself some moral redemption; after all, when you think about it, a movie is just a fancy "morality play."

Here are the things that I found wrong in this movie:  Even though Alvin and the Chipmunks are world famous singers, nobody seemed to care about them as they were embarking on the ship.  No mango fruit grows on a bough.  Am I right to assume that the woman wore the same outfit for years, yet it didn't wear out or fade at all?  In this day and age, no active volcano ( no matter how remote its location ) will not get the attention of scientists all over the world.  That volcanic island would have been monitored day and night in the air, at sea and on land by said scientists.

SHERLOCK HOLMES: A GAME OF SHADOWS, PG - 13 ( 2 hr & 9 min )

Quickie Review:  Sherlock Holmes ( Robert Downey, Jr. ) finally meets his match in the evil-minded genius, Professor Moriarty ( Jared Harris ), who is Hell-bent on starting a world war so that he can sell to both sides of the conflict.

The audience liked this movie, but it didn't get a "Hands Clapper" ending.

I liked this movie, too.  It's definitely better than the first one.  And Jared Harris played his bad-guy role so convincingly that he might be up for an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor.

Here are the things that I found wrong in this movie:  Formaldehyde is a very dangerous neuro-toxin--it can "pickle" the brain, something Holmes would not want to happen to his brain ( one might rightfully assume ).  The horses should have been spooked by the horseless carriage puttering around town.  When Holmes disarmed the Cossack assassin, the bad guy just kept his right arm extended instead of reflexively pulling it back!  Mary Watson ( Kelly Reilly ) pretended to be morally shocked at the sight of the naked man but ... she read the telegram facing him and with her eyes strategically looking down in that direction!  Those two men sitting around didn't notice it when the iron grate was flung wide open.  Sure, he was a marksman but bear in mind that he was just wounded, he was full of Adrenaline, he had been running all that time, and his heart was pumping hard and fast--there was no way that he could have calmed his body down very quickly to make that long-distance kill-shot without first propping his rifle on the ground or on a rock or a tree stump/fallen branch. When they were at Mycroft Holmes' ( Stephen Fry ) place, the Gypsy guy was not in the room with them when he should have been since he was part of Sherlock's group.  No surgeon in the late 1800s used Cortisone for plastic surgery; so, the facial scar should not have been so smooth.  The would-be assassin was disguised as a foreign diplomat--here's my logical deduction:  The would-be assassin might look the part and might also act the part but he was foreign-born and would be expected to speak the diplomat's language with a foreign accent ( "Elementary, my dear Watson.  Elementary ...." )

Note:  'Sorry for this quickie review.  I'm caught-up in the Holiday Rush writing financial proposals to 341 businesses; and I'm still prospecting for more!  And I will be kept busy with my business leads 'til the end of January, 2012.

THE SITTER, R ( 1 hr & 40 min )

Quickie Review:  A former college kid decides to do his mom a big favor by taking on a baby-sitting job for one of their neighbors.  With no baby-sitting experience whatsoever, he finds himself with a handful of little brats on a wild and crazy night out on the town.

This movie was just mildly entertaining.  It drew just a few laughs from me and from the rest of the audience.

What did the filmmakers think of when they went ahead and made this movie, that putting little kids in age-inappropriate characterizations would make for one cute and "laugh-out-loud" funny movie?  Well, they sure missed the mark on this one!

Here are the things that I found wrong about this movie:  His girlfriend sure didn't know how to fake an orgasm--it was so unconvincing!  He lived near the neighbors that he babysat for.  Neighbors who were obviously friends with his mom and had more than just passing/casual interactions with her.  So, the comment that he made and the subsequent hug that he gave the woman after she opened the front door for him--even if it was just meant to be a sleazy scene--didn't make sense at all!  If they wanted the little "firebug" to stop blowing things up with M-80 firecrackers, all they had to do was cut-out his allowance so that he wouldn't have the money to purchase such fireworks.  And, wait a minute, M-80s and Cherry Bombs were banned from manufacture in this country back in 1966 under the Child Protection Act!  Where did he go to, then, to buy such illegal fireworks?  His face got covered in cocaine and he didn't inhale any of it, not even accidentally?  He had the GPS with him; he could have called the cops to have them help him retrieve the minivan.  How did that beautiful black girl know where to find him?  Or do all the black people in this movie only have one place to hang-out at, a pool-hall?  The M-80 that exploded near the driver's crotch should have done more damage to his manhood!  When the minivan hit something, its airbags didn't get activated.  How did the little girl know what number to call to summon aid?  And how did the rescue party get there quickly?  The damage to the vehicle will most likely get him in "hot water" with the law and with its owner.  And I don't think the bad guy will let him off that easily.  A comment in a Bonus Scene character update was in poor taste, and unnecessarily so!

ARTHUR CHRISTMAS 3-D, PG ( 1 hr & 40 min )

Quickie Review:  Santa now runs a very "tight ship", all high-tech and super-efficient.  But a minor glitch in the system leaves a Nice child without a Christmas present---Gasp!  As Christmas Eve slowly begins to fade into Christmas Day, panic ensues at Santa's Command Center under the  North Pole until Santa's youngest son, Arthur ( with the help of Grandsanta ), steps-up to save the day.

I liked it, although there were chaotic and complicated scenes involving Multinational Defense Forces all on Red Alert!  The little brats might get alarmed and confused by said scenes.  But the scene wherein the little girl opened-up her Christmas present was an especially touching scene.  Also, the scene in which she saw a glimpse of Santa was a very sweet one.

Unfortunately, I went to see this movie at 8:35 p.m. last night in Fairfield, CA. The last show for the evening, and on a school day, too, for that matter!  So, I found myself all by my lonesome inside the auditorium.  Therefore, I had no way of gauging what the audience reaction to this movie could have been.

Here's what I found wrong about this movie:  The animation quality in this movie is not quite up-to-par with the animation quality of other recent computer animation movies.  But I am not going to pettifog over such trivialities since this is just  a kids' movie.

I really wanted to see this movie at a matinee show today, Thursday, when little brats would most likely be in attendance.  But I have so many things on my To-Do ( Holiday Rush ) List for Today that I cannot possibly squeeze this into my schedule.

Sorry ....