THE DUFF, PG-13 ( 1 hr & 41 min )

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I went to see this today, Friday, February 20th, 2015, here in Vallejo, CA, at the CENTURY 14 VALLEJO, for the 11:20 a.m. Extra Dollar Off First Show Matinee in auditorium 1, 4th row ( counting from the front ), 7th column ( counting from the left ). The price of admission was $7.15. And I bought a $5.95 Snack Pack at the concessions counter.

Quickie Review: A plain girl, Bianca ( Mae Whitman ), is shocked to learn from a likable jock, Wesley ( Robbie Amell ), that she just might be her best friends' D.U.F.F. ( designated ugly, fat friend ). And, so, with Wesley's help, she sets out to reinvent herself.

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This is so true. High school is when kids are just starting to discover their own identities and seek approval from their classmates. It is also a time when kids get abused and bullied a lot if they don't fit-in with the "In Crowd".

I have, indeed, observed superficial beautiful girls with girlfriends who are left wanting in the Face Department. ( I have a very beautiful niece whose bffs are not so "facially-appealing"---but I'm not saying that my niece is superficial, though! ) And I was worried how this movie's message would be construed by such unlucky ones. But I breathed a sigh of relief because this movie ends with a "Positive Vibe" to it.

I don't know why they didn't use the 1975 hit song, At Seventeen, by Janis Ian, for this movie. It would have been perfect!

Doesn't she look like a young Barbra Streisand? I found this on Wikipedia. 

I loved singing this song, by the way. 'Brings back memories. LOL

p.s. Not all of them are "duffs," some are D.U.S.F. ( designated ugly, skinny friend ).

p.p.s. I couldn't help but notice a similarity between Mae's performance in this movie and Ellen Page's performance in the movie, JUNO. But, of course,  Ellen is hotter.

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I went to my periodontist today, at 7:00 a.m. for deep cleaning. The prognosis is not good: I may lose another tooth--or two! I suspect that it has to do with age-related bone loss that cannot be remedied simply by taking Calcium supplements.

Doing my own research, I learned that I am deficient in Magnesium, a mineral that's needed for bone growth. And, at my age, my Testosterone is at a lower level than it was in my teen years. Testosterone is also needed for bone growth and bone density. I have started a diet program at the first of this month that addresses my need for more Magnesium and Testosterone.

After my periodontal appointment, I went to the Safeway Supermarket on Admiral Callaghan Lane to buy some groceries.

Then, I went to my chiropractor for a spinal adjustment. I signed-up for another year's worth of service with the clinic.

When I got home and before I went to see this movie, I went jogging/sprinting ( for the Sun-derived Vitamin D--also needed for bone building ) at the nearby park, Dan Foley Park.

After the movie, I went to Selecta Pilipino Buffet Restaurant on Springs Road to have a high fat/high protein/low carb lunch. I also bought some lottery tickets.

Then, I went next door to the 99-Cent Only Store to buy a calculator, a ruler and a pack of clasp manila envelopes because I'm preparing my 2014 tax return.

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FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, R ( 2 hr & 4 min )

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I went to see this on Tuesday, February 17th, 2015, here in Vallejo, CA, at the CENTURY 14 VALLEJO for the 5:50 p.m. show in auditorium 8, 7th row ( counting from the front ), 9th column ( counting from the left ). The price of admission was $6.25 ( $6.25 All-Day special price ). I bought a $6.95 medium Buttered Popcorn + a $0.65 upgrade on a free small ( special offer on my Cine-Mark movie reward e-mail coupon ) Powerade Mountain Berry Blast at the concessions counter.

Quickie Review: A young and innocent woman, Anastasia Steele ( Dakota Johnson ), is thrust into the private, kinky world of a handsome young billionaire bachelor, Christian Grey ( Jamie Dornan ). She becomes fascinated by his self-assuredness  and domineering ways with young impressionable females; and, he, in turn, is drawn-in by her plainness and naivete.

I shall have to step aside and have somebody else comment on this subject:

from: THEYCALLMEMUMMY.COM

My precious children,

Tonight, I succumbed to peer pressure (exactly what I caution you NEVER to do) and went with a bunch of girlfriends to see Fifty Shades of Grey. I ignored the little voice in my head that implored me to just say “no!” because, after all, it’s just a silly movie, right? Well, I wish I had done as I always tell you to do and given that voice credit because it was right. The thing is, I’m also kind of glad I didn’t because now I have these words for you.

One day, in the not very distant future, I’m going to blink and gasp as I realise you’re suddenly old enough to see movies like Fifty Shades of Grey, yourselves. Of course, you or your friends may even decide that curiosity wins and risk sneaking a peek even earlier than that. Either way, I have to accept the hard fact that your innocent eyes and your uncorrupted minds are going to see this drivel sooner or later.

I am writing this so that when that day comes, you’ll recognise Fifty Shades of Grey for what it is, rather than what it pretends to be.

Let me begin by telling you what Fifty Shades of Grey is not.

It is not a love story.

It does a pretty convincing job of masquerading as one, for sure, but please believe me when I say that love doesn’t even have a cameo role in this plot.

It is also not a romantic fairytale with a harmless bit of naughtiness sprinkled on top.

Romance is glaringly absent, in fact. As for harmless S&M, please understand that this screenplay’s message is the polar opposite of harmless. In this ‘harmless’ piece of fluff movie, a rich, handsome, experienced man uses his power to seduce and manipulate a young, innocent student into doing a lot of things she is extremely uncomfortable doing.

They are not equals. They are not partners. There is, in fact, no ‘they’ to speak of at all.

Rather, it’s a movie about a narcissistic man’s controlling and violent sexual desires and his sense of entitlement to use and abuse a vulnerable young woman’s body and mind as tools for his own gratification. It’s all about his needs, coupled with the arrogant expectation that she should comply, regardless of her discomfort, to please him.

I sat in the theatre and looked around me at hundreds of women, buying into this so-called ‘sexy love story’ and I felt sick. If an entire theatre of women three times your age couldn’t see how damaging this plot line is, how on earth are teenage girls and boys supposed to?

Please, my daughters, don’t allow this romanticising of sexual domestic abuse fool you into believing that you should ever allow yourself to be treated like Anastasia Steele. Please, my son, don’t watch this one day and believe that it’s ever okay to intimidate, manipulate or disrespect a woman like the ‘hero’, Christian Grey. Nobody, male or female, wants or deserves to be disrespected, manipulated or violated against their wishes.

I hope, when the day comes that you’re grown up enough to be in a relationship, that you’ll understand that what goes on behind bedroom doors should always be pleasurable for both of you, regardless of your tastes. I hope you’ll understand that consent given under duress isn’t consent at all. I hope you’ll demand respect and that you’ll give respect in return.

Tonight, I walked out of the cinema feeling terrified and a little sad for your generation. If this is the movie that you base your ideals of love and romance on, then I need to make some things very clear and I hope you’re listening.

If someone wants to be with you, turning up at your part-time job unannounced when you haven’t ever even discussed that you have one and acting possessive when a co-worker talks to you is not romantic. It’s creepy.

If you say you’re a virgin and he responds by violently deflowering you, that’s not love. That’s assault.

If he tracks your whereabouts when you’re out clubbing and takes you to his hotel when you’re too drunk to make a rational decision, then undresses you and puts you in his bed for the night, that’s not protective. It’s stalking. In fact, stalking is the least of what it is.

If he turns up inside your apartmentuninvited, it’s not romantic. It’s breaking and entering.

If you tell him you’re not interested and you ask him to leave and he responds by tying you to your bed and having violent sex with you after you repeatedly say “no”, all the while threatening to do worse if you make a noise, it’s not passion. It’s rape.

If he sells your car and buys you a new one without your permission “to surprise you”, it’s not romantic. It’s theft and manipulation.

If he monitors your phone calls and threatens you with physical harm because another man calls you, he’s not in love with you. He’s abusing and controlling you.

If beating you with a leather strap until you cry is what gives him pleasure and he asks you to do it despite your distress because it turns him on and then plays the victim to explain it all away, there is no soundtrack in the world that should quiet the voice in your head that yells out that love and romance were never in the picture and they never will be.

My children, this film was deeply disturbing to me, and I have life experience on my side. I shudder to think that you are going to grow up with stories like this to model relationships on and that you or the people you date will mistake this for ‘normal’.

Please, my precious children, know this: Love is gentle. Love never takes. Love does not demand. Love waits for consent. Love doesn’t need helicopter rides and expensive gifts. Love is enough.

When there’s love, the voice in your head doesn’t yell. It simply doesn’t have to.

My children, listen to me on this, if nothing else.

And, if you choose not to listen to me, then listen to the voice in your head.

With abundant love,

Mum

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Well, that was some good observation on the subject, wasn't it?

And, now, for my "two-cents'" worth ....

Let me start with the title, itself. The setting for this movie is here in America. And, obviously, the principal characters are American. Therefore, Grey's named should have been spelled with an "A". British English would call for the use of the spelling, GREY; but American English calls for the use of the spelling, GRAY. I know that the author of the novel that this movie is based on is British. But, still, it should have been spelled in conventional American English. Unless, of course, the story was originally imagined for a British readership.

Now that we're on the subject of when to use the letter, E, it is properly used in ... Blonde ( blond, if the subject is male ), Brunette ( brunet, if the subject is male ) and Fiancee ( fiance, if the subject is male ). 'Get it? 'Got it! Good.

I commented to a female co-worker that the leading lady in this movie isn't "hot". She said that that's how it is in the book. Oops, my bad. ( I would just like to point out that Mr. Grey's receptionist is way hot! )

Speaking of the receptionist, why didn't she say anything when Anastasia tripped and fell? Did Anastasia "fall on deaf ears"? Ha, ha, ha. ( 'Sorry, I couldn't help myself. )

That helicopter must have run out of gas if Christian had to use a car to drive her back home the following day!

You know, I have a hard time associating saggy breasts with a young virgin. Maybe, an old spinster virgin, yes. But a young virgin, no!

Why does this movie remind me so much of Larry Flynt's magazine, HUSTLER'S TABOO, coupled with Bob Guccione's magazine, PENTHOUSE LETTERS? Oops! Well, all I can say is that I'm an aspiring writer and an aspiring writer has got to do what has got to be done. ( Research-wise, of course. Heh, heh, heh .... )

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Hey, wait a minute .... I think that DJ was wrong about the supposed rampant sex between "teens" depicted in this movie! Lesson learned: Don't listen to anyone say something about a movie if said person slept all the way through it in the first place. Ha, ha, ha.



p.s. I couldn't post this on Tuesday because my 2005 Compaq Presario died out on me and I didn't want to fetch my Acer C-7 Google Chromebook at that moment because I lost "the mode" for writing, there and then.

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KINGSMAN: THE SECRET SERVICE, R ( 2 hr & 9 min )

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where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Thursday, February 12th, 2015
show: 8:00 p.m. Advance Screening
costs: $7.90 Ticket + $5.95 small Buttered Popcorn + $0.00 ( free on my Cine-Mark movie watcher reward e-mail coupon ) small Powerade Mountain Berry Blast = $13.85
auditorium: 14
seat: 3rd row ( counting from the front ), 7th column ( counting from the left )

2nd time

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where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Monday ( Presidents' Day ), February 16th, 2015
show: 11:10 a.m. Extra Dollar Off First Show Matinee
costs: $7.15 Ticket + $6.95 medium Buttered Popcorn + $0.65 ( upgrade on a free small fountain drink on my Cine-Mark movie watcher reward e-mail coupon ) medium Powerade Mountain Berry Blast + $1.50 Kernel Season's Cheddar flavored Popcorn Topper = $16.25
auditorium: 1
seat: 4th row ( counting from the front ), 5th column ( counting from the left )

synopsis/overview: A street punk with potential, Eggsy (  Taron Egerton ), is chosen as a candidate in a highly-competitive training program that will determine who will become the next spy to join an exclusive super secret service organization just as a tech genius madman, Valentine ( Samuel L. Jackson ), is about to unleash his diabolical plan to drastically reduce the world's population.

noteworthy scenes: 1,) Middle Eastern fortress; 2.) Suicide bomber; 3.) Medal of Valor; 4.) "Oxfords, not Brogues"; 5.) Failed hostage rescue; 6.) Diabolical weapon; 7. ) Gaia Theory; 8.) Car chase; 9.) 'Phone call; 10.) Pub brawl; 11.) "Enough evidence on your activity"; 12.) "Like MY FAIR LADY"; 13.) Secret base of operation; 14.) The new recruits; 15.) Body bags; 16.) Secret sauce; 17.) Flooded room; 18.) "You all forgot the most important thing: Teamwork"; 19.) The college classroom; 20.) Chinese secret service; 21.) "It's a bulldog, ain't it"; 22.) Puppy training; 23.) "You are completely crazy"; 24.) Guards; 25.) Surveillance video; 26.) The announcement; 27.) Parachute jump; 28.) Burgers and fries; 29.) "Do you like spy movies"; 30.) "Thank you for such a 'Happy Meal'"; 31.) Missing celebrities and dignitaries; 32.) "We certainly will"; 33.) Night club pick-up lines; 34.) "Rohypnol or something stronger"; 35.) Train tracks; 36.) Front page headlines;  37.) Fitting room 3; 38.) "German aristocrat's formal greeting"; 39.) "What a coincidence"; 40.) "You all talk so funny"; 41.) James Bond, Jason Bourne, Jack Bauer; 42.) Final test; 43.) Auto drive; 44.) Mr. Pickle; 45.) South Glade Mission Church; 46.) "This ain't that kind of movie"; 47.) "Is he dead"; 48.) Napoleonic Brandy, 49.) Culling; 50.) Secret doomsday base; 51.) The chosen people; 52.) "Well, my family was invited"; 53.) Gunfight; 54.) "Uh, uh. This is mine"; 55.) "I need a piggyback"; 56.) Pinned down; 57.) Fireworks; 58.) "You didn't stop this"; 59.) "I'll be right back"; 60.) The shoe dagger; 61.) "Perfect ..."; 62.) "Oh, my lord"; and 63.) "Manners maketh man."

favorite scenes: Church Fight scene

Fireworks scene.

audience reaction: The audience enjoyed this movie.  Some people gave it a "Hands Clapper" ending.

2nd audience reaction: This audience enjoyed the movie, too. Some people clapped their hands after the church fight ended. And, of course,  some people also gave this movie a "Hands Clapper" ending. 

recommendation: I liked this teen update on the British spy movies,  too. Go see this Action/Comedy movie.

spoiler alert! Why couldn't the guards have seen and heard the helicopter coming? One of the spies standing behind the seated terrorist could have easily kicked the chair down ( of course, in such a situation, it's hard to figure out how one will react ). When the bad guy's trigger finger was shot off, he could have switched to his middle finger. There was not enough blood when the man was cleaved by the super-sharp blade. That car couldn't have gone fast while in reverse gear. The pint of beer was inexplicably emptied too soon. There was enough force in that stun projectile to kill that man. Those artificial "feet" were made of smooth steel and would not have the traction necessary in the forefoot for running at top speed. Burgers and fries, what a way to make a first impression. Heck, if I were a young spy, I'd plaster my wall with Page 3 girls--'just sayin'! Why weren't there any young children during the church service---Duh! Killing billions, a few hundred million or even tens of millions would be very bad for the environment/ecology, just think about it. All of those bullets spraying from automatic rifles and not one of them hit their target---Yeah, right .... Why wasn't the toddler affected by the "killer frequency"? I felt sorry for the pub's owner; I hope that he had enough insurance to cover such repeated damages to his establishment.

fyi: "Global Warming" is a hoax!

>>>Dear Reader:

Christopher Booker of the UK Telegraph calls man-made global warming the “biggest science scandal ever,” and it’s easy to see why.

Recent studies have shown:

• Temperature data from NASA’s Goddard Institute for Space Studies (GISS) was dramatically altered, and rather than showing a 1.5-degree Celsius increase from 1950 to 2014, the raw data actually showed a 1-degree Celsius temperature decrease over those 65 years.
• Two of the official data records for climate temperatures — Remote Sensing Systems (RSS) in California, and the University of Alabama in Huntsville (UAH) — have recorded 18 straight years of no temperature increases, and 2014, recently called the “warmest year ever” was, in fact, only the sixth warmest year since 1997.
• Arctic ice levels, it turns out, have nothing to do with alleged man-made global warming. The decrease in Artic ice is simply a byproduct of naturally occurring cyclical shifts in warm water currents. In fact, when the warm water currents last peaked 75 years ago, Arctic ice had retreated even further back than it has recently.

None of this is news to John Casey, who has been at the forefront of the movement calling man-made global warming a total hoax.

Casey, a former White House space program adviser, consultant to NASA headquarters, and space shuttle engineer, found evidence — buried right in the government’s own environmental studies — that destroys the argument for “global warming.”

Using their own data, John has proven that “global warming” is a sham backed by a network of politicians, corporations, and scientists conspiring to promote the fear of “global warming” . . . despite clear evidence that no such “global warming” exists.

Tom Luongo

Editor, Resolute Wealth Letter<<<

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The late "conspiracy theory" author, Bill Cooper ( who was executed two months after 9/11 for his knowledge about the truth behind the attack ), mentioned in his book, Behold A Pale Horse, that the late Philippine dictator, Ferdinand Marcos, was deposed when his "Family Planning is the Pillar of a New Society" campaign failed to stem the country's population growth. Bill Cooper claimed that there is a secret society that manipulates nations into going to war with each other to keep the world population in check. If that's the case, then we are long overdue for another "culling"!

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I have a hard time driving my car in reverse.

I had an expensive pair of Oxfords once ( which I only wore three times ). I had to give it to my younger brother when my feet grew from a size 8 1/2 to a size 9 1/2. No, it didn't conceal a weapon at all. It did, however, conceal heel lifts as it was actually a pair of Elevator Shoes! And my brother is in need of such a pair more than I do. Ha, ha, ha.

Gazelle ( Sofia Boutella ) is hot!

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What is it with European males' obsession with anal sex? I just don't get it. Don't they know anything about Karma?

word of advice: Better yourself.

tidbits: When I was paying for my purchase at the concessions counter, the couple next in line mentioned that they were there to see FIFTY SHADES OF GREY. I whispered to the cashier, Chick flick. That movie can wait.

The cashier laughed.

2nd tidbits: First order of the day was to have a STAR Smog Test done on my car. As it was being done, I walked a few yards to get to my chiropractor's clinic. But it was closed because today is a holiday,  Presidents' Day. But I double-checked two weeks ago to make sure that they would be open today.  The receptionist said, "Yes." That bitch lied. Anyway,  I went back to the smog center to use their Wi-Fi so that I could access the Internet with my 2005 Compaq Presario laptop. It took my computer a long time to boot-up. Heck, the smog test was done before I could even get on the Internet! My 2001 Hyundai Accent passed the test easily, by the way. 

After I dropped off some stuff at my place, I drove on over to the local CSAA to pay for my car's license and insurance.  But the place was also closed for the holiday.

So, I had plenty of time to catch this movie's first show matinée. I had to see it a second time because I liked it and also because I didn't take notes the first time that I watched it. 

I saw a casual friend at the theatre. DJ was there to see FIFTY SHADES OF GREY. I told him that there was some negative feedback posted online from that movie, and that he should go see Kingsman, instead.

After the movie, I went to Harbor Freight, on Solano Avenue, to buy a box of black nitrile gloves ( $11.99 + tax ) for use at work. Then, I went to Selecta Pilipino Buffet Restaurant on Springs Road for a late lunch.

As I was paying for my meal and for some lottery tickets ( $17.36 total ), in walked DJ. So, how was the movie, I asked.

"Oh, I fell asleep."

I told you it was bad.

"Was it really bad?" asked Rey, the proprietor.

I quipped, He fell asleep, didn't he?

We all laughed.

"The movie started at 11:30 a.m. I fell asleep. When I looked at my watch, it was already 1:00 p.m." said DJ. "It was full of teens. I'm glad I didn't snore."

"What's the movie about?" asked Rey, the proprietor.

"It's about teens having sex all the time, everywhere," said DJ. "It's the number one teen movie for Valentines' weekend."

And it's not even rated NC-17, I commented. 

"But I fell asleep," said DJ once more. "I just wasted seven bucks."

Hmm, I think that I'll go see this movie tomorrow--strictly for review purposes only ( yeah, right ... ). That reminds me, I'd better have a good night's sleep tonight! Ha, ha, ha.

*

THE AMAZING PRAYBET BENJAMIN, PG-13 ( 1 hr & 45 min )

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I went to see this last week, on Thursday, February 5th, 2015, here in Vallejo, CA, at the CENTURY 14 VALLEJO, for the 1:00 p.m. show in auditorium 8, 5th row ( counting from the front ), 8ht column ( counting from the left ). The price of admission was $6.00 for the First Show Matinee ( I was given the "senior discount." Whatever .... ). I bought a small Buttered Popcorn ( $5.75 ) along with a free small Powerade Mountain Berry Blast ( free on my Cine-Mark Movie Watcher Reward e-mail coupon ) at the concessions counter.

Quickie Review: After having defeated a horde of French zombies, Pvt. Benjamin ( Vice Ganda ) becomes the Philippines' proud national hero. But his insubordination gets him in hot water soon enough with his commanding officer. To stay enlisted, he must become the personal bodyguard of his commanding officer's estranged son who knows the whereabouts of three bombs planted in the Northern Philippines by a terrorist group.

I didn't find this movie amusing at all. But I did find it a waste of my precious time and hard-earned money. This has got to be The Most stupid movie that I have ever seen in my whole life--and I've seen plenty, believe you me! But this one "eats the cake" all by its lonesome self. And it isn't even Stupid-Funny at all. That was 1 Hour & 45 Minutes of my whole life that I will never get back ever again or even make up for.

And I didn't care to know how the other Pilipinos in the sparse audience liked this movie.

This movie wouldn't even rate a passing grade as a student film project, in my honest opinion!

And, to think, I almost made it in movies back in the Philippines in 1982. I was there for a scene shooting for the movie, CROSS MY HEART, which was filmed on location in Quezon City. I mingled with the cast and crew. I met with its director, Mr. Eddie Garcia, who plays a role in this Vice Ganda movie. Anyway, another director happened by and took an interest in me. Had it not been for my sister who kept calling me to come back to the States a.s.a.p. or risk losing my visa, I would have accepted the second director's offer and would have stayed in the Philippines to make a name for myself as an actor and, eventually,  as a movie director! If I knew then what I know now .... ( "Hindsight is always 20/20." )

Speaking of the actor/director Mr. Eddie Garcia, he looks like he had shrunk in height in this movie. He was quite tall when I met him in person 33 years ago.

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