Showing posts with label strip club. Show all posts
Showing posts with label strip club. Show all posts

Sunday, January 28, 2024

SAMMY SLICK: VAMPIRE SLAYER

I saw this movie late tonight, Saturday, January 27th, 2024, in my living room πŸͺ‘, via my computer's πŸ’» TUBI Streaming App.

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First off, this isn't much of a Comedy unless you consider flirtatious Repartee funny. Someone might, however, consider such sexual innuendo back & forth banter between the main characters as "sexual harassment." πŸ™„

Second, the 1-2 seconds of "blackouts" between scenes are just too distracting.

Sammy Slick can kick but the fight scenes are too poorly choreographed.

That 1st fight should have been a 3 against 1 since there were 3 bad guys present. And We Know That Bad Guys Are Not Sportsmanlike When It Comes To Fights❗Especially if it's a Do or Die situation! 

There is too much talking πŸ—£️ going on in this movie. And there are 2 or more scenes of Sammy doing a monologue while facing the camera. A movie implies SHOWING, not talking too much!

This is a different breed of vampires. They smell of Lavender, they eat Garlic, they drink Holy Water, the Sun ☀️ doesn't affect them, they can not turn their victims into vampires, they can procreate with each other, they can have sex with their human victims and only a Silver Stake through the Heart can kill them!

Vampire or no vampire, why would you sleep with your bedroom window curtains not drawn closed?

The strip club patrons were all standing around mindlessly throwing dollar bills at the strippers without so much as saying a word. 🀦‍♂️ You'd think that none of them have ever been to a strip club---Hey, I'm not incriminating myself!  πŸ€ͺ

If they victimize 42 men ( and why was there a female victim? ) each week, their strip club should have already been on the cops' radar! 🀷‍♂️

The victim's Blood looked too liquidy.  πŸ‘Ž

Why is there no Crime Scene Tape put across the door? And why would someone sleep on a bed πŸ›️ where a victim was just brutally murdered hours before? 🀷‍♂️🀦‍♂️

Wow, a vampire is nice enough to use a car's turn signal indicator.  😁

The vampire guard had really bad Peripheral Vision! πŸ‘€ πŸ˜„

Since you know that vampires go for the neck, why not put on a thick neck brace before you go out hunting for them?  🀷‍♂️

At least, these vampires don't leave a mess behind for the slayers to clean up after! 😏

Finally, a door creaks as it opens At ... The ... End! πŸ˜’

There's a Bonus Scene tacked at the very end. 

TIDBITS:

This movie was released on June 15th of last year. It's an independent production funded through Indiegogo. 

I had a chance meeting with Daniel, a former co-worker, in the overflow parking area of my condominium complex. He found another place of employment 2 years ago, I learned. He doesn't have to deal with customers anymore. So, that's a definite plus πŸ‘ for him! He was there to pick-up his girlfriend. His girlfriend impatiently called him on his phone πŸ“± because I detained him with our conversation. So, I had to let him go. 

I swung by Island Pacific before going to Selecta Pilipino Buffet Restaurant because I have a big craving for Pinoy Pork Rinds, Tsitsaron na may Laman ( pork rinds with fat & meat attached ). 🀀

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I bought the Pink, Purple & Orange
labeled ones. I can't wait to
satisfy my craving!
Pinoy Tsitsaron pa More
( more Pilipino Pork Rinds )!
❗πŸ‡΅πŸ‡­❗

There's a new Pinoy restaurant which just recently opened between Island Pacific and Selecta Pilipino Buffet Restaurant:

This used to be the Ihaw-Ihaw ( broiled 
dishes ) Restaurant. 

I had lunch and bought some lottery tickets at Selecta Pilipino Buffet Restaurant. I also talked to my sister in Michigan about some financial matters.

Then, I went to the Dollar Tree Store to buy a 2 qt ( 1.89 L ) bottle of 9pH AlkaNine Water, an 18 oz ( 530 ml )  zero sugar Bai Lemonade drink and an 8 oz ( 227 g ) plastic shaker container of Forrelli French Vanilla Coffee Creamer.

This is the 7 oz foreign 
market version. πŸ˜•

Some Diabetic Asshole Lowlife stole a bottle's worth of Weight Loss & Turmeric pills from the Dollar Tree Store!

❗😠❗😑❗🀬❗

I then went to the 99-Cents Only Store next door to Selecta Pilipino Buffet Restaurant to buy a bag of Unsalted Sunflower Seeds, a bag of Salted Pumpkin Seeds and a bundle of Asparagus.

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And now, here are the winners of today's 24-Hour Le Cine-Man's Race: Drumroll πŸ₯ please ... 

Congratulations to Singapore for
taking first place!
πŸŽ‰πŸŽ†πŸ†πŸŽ‡πŸŽŠ
πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¬πŸ₯‡πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¬
❗❗
🍾
And China for second place.
πŸ‡¨πŸ‡³πŸ₯ˆπŸ‡¨πŸ‡³
❗❗
And the USA for third place.
πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ₯‰πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ
❗❗
Canada for fourth place.
πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦πŸ…πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦
❗❗
And Germany for fifth place.
πŸ‡©πŸ‡ͺπŸŽ–️πŸ‡©πŸ‡ͺ
❗❗

Thanks to all of you who participated in this latest 24-Hour endurance competition which is
open to all countries in the
whole 🌍 World 🌎.
All you need to qualify is access to my movie
blogsite and access to the
Internet ❗πŸ‘❗

*

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

THE GOODS: LIVE HARD, SELL HARD; R ( 1 hr & 29 min )


where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Monday, August 17th, 2009
show: 10:35 pm
costs: $9.50 Ticket + $3.75 small Zero ( w/ Barq's & Cherry flavors ) + $3.02 bulk Chocolate Candy = $16.27
auditorium: 12
seat: 4th row, 8th column

synopsis: A "mercenary car sales hustling team" run by Don Ready ( Jeremy Piven ), is enlisted to aid an ailing car dealership on the brink of bankruptcy in Temecula, CA, owned by Ben Selleck ( James Brolin ). In the "meet and greet" with the owners, Don falls for the daughter, Ivy ( Jordana Spiro ), who's not that all impressed by his hustle. Complicating matters are Ivy's spoiled and obnoxious boyfriend, Paxton ( Ed Helms ), the son of a car dealership rival, and the lingering "-querque curse." Don now has a double-barrelled objective during the 4th of July weekend: Sell dad's cars to win daughter's heart. Will it end with a bang or will it be a dud?

who? Will Ferrell has a cameo role.

noteworthy scenes: 1.) Breakfast at a Flagstaff, Arizona strip club; 2.) The plane ride; 3.) The airport; 4.) The dinner; 5.) The Temecula strip club; 6.) Wade Zooha's ( Tony Hale ) family pictures; 7.) The sales lot; 8.) The TV ad; 9.) The riot; 10.) "Abe Lincoln;" 11.) Brent ( David Koechner ) and Blake ( Jonathan Sadowski ) talking about Don; 12.) The "lights out;" 13.) The morning after; 14.) The Junkyard; 15.) The "Bandit;" and 16.) The "after ending credits" scene.

audience reaction: This movie elicited a few laughs from the audience.

recommendation: Save your money and wait for this to come out on DVD.

spoiler alert! Years ago, a movie reviewer made the observation that if a movie shows nudity early on, it usually means that the movie as a whole will turn out bad. This movie is no exception to the rule: A movie that is not only sleazy but also suggestively smacks of age-inappropriate "cougar prowling ...," probably the reasons why this movie didn't make it to the theatres for the 4th of July weekend. And given that lots of car dealerships were forced into bankruptcy within the last two years, it was tacky to even conceive of this movie in the first place!

fyi: I went with a friend, Derek T., to a strip club in San Francisco, CA, years ago. We had lap dances. I wasn't particularly stimulated by the sexual simulation because I felt like I was just a piece of toilet paper to the stripper. Meanwhile, Derek was having such a good time because he ran out of five dollar bills for the lap dances way before I did. At one point, he leaned over and whispered in my ear if I could lend him five bucks. I said, Sure, but do a lap dance on me first! We both laughed at that.

word of advice: Don't fly on a plane that has ashtrays since it was probably built before 1971. Such planes are old and structurally weakened and should have already been decommissioned from commercial flights a long time ago.

tidbits: I originally intended to see the Japanese animation, PONYO, but I couldn't make it to the theatre in time for the 9:40 p.m. show. So, I just went to the Admiral Callahan Lane McDonald's for burger and fries ( the # 12 on the menu ) while I waited for the 10:35 p.m. showing of THE GOODS: ...."

P.S. To this day, my friend, Derek, still owes me five bucks!