where: EDWARDS FAIRFIELD STADIUM 16 & I-MAX in Fairfield, CA
when: Tuesday, December 8ht, 2009
show: 12:00 p.m.
costs: $7.50 Ticket + $7.58 Great Wall Chinese Buffet lunch ( + $1.25 tip ) + $1.07 Note Pad = $17.40
auditorium: 15
seat: 5th row, 10th column
synopsis: A group of unwitting American students go to Transylvania for a semester of academics and cultural immersion at Razvan University where a stalker/killer and vampires await them.
noteworthy scenes: 1.) Laptop; 2.) History; 3.) Music box; 4.) The shuttle ride; 5.) Ural side-car motorcycle; 6.) Are we there yet?; 7.) Combat & Self-Defense class; 8.) Codex Eroticon; 9.) The internet girlfriend; 10.) The pin prick; 11.) Illegal hunt; 12.) Necklace; 13.) Frankenstein-type lab; 14.) The "vampire slayer"; 15.) Morning after; 16.) The surgery; 17.) The costume ball; 18.) Showdown; 19.) The "doctor"; 20.) Jeans pool; and 21.) The werewolf huntress.
audience reaction: None. I was the only one in the audience.
recommendation: I found this neither funny nor erotic in anyway. It's strictly a rental.
spoiler alert! This is a very sophomoric stab at humor. The trinkets lady on the train spoke to every passenger in English even though local Romanians were on board as well, and dem white people all be lookin' da same to me. The victim in the coffin twitched his eye. Vampires are suppose to be eternally youthful, but the topless vampiresses showed noticeable "mileage" on their faces already--and one of them had a boob job! How in heck did she find the time to have implants put in when plastic surgeons only work in the DAYTIME? This reminds me of the movie THIR13EN GHOSTS ( 2001 ) in which a topless ghost with a boob job haunted the place--apparently there are some things that you can take with you! Since when did vampires learn to do Oriental martial arts? In an early scene, the vampire count's right hand got burned when it was exposed to sunlight; but later on in the movie, when the count ran in broad daylight covered by his own cape, his left hand didn't get burned even though it was exposed to sunlight. The couple which was making-out didn't hear the door slam. A re-capitated and re-sewn multiple amputee can never live, let alone ambulate. At the party, the sutures were absent with no surgical wounds evident. Why cut the body up into pieces in the first place when all that was needed was a head job ( i.e. head transplant )?
fyi: The salesman who sold me my blue 2001 Hyundai Accent at a Ford dealership in San Leandro, CA is from Romania. And he told me that the Romanian language has its roots in Latin which is why it is called Romanian, named after the Romans who settled the region.
The Ural Sidecar Motorcycle is the most enduring and most mass-produced vehicle model in the world, in production since before World War II. This is BMW's most successful model ever! I hope to get one for myself someday.
word of advice: Save your money for a better movie.
tidbits: I have a total of eighteen mini note books, but I brought none with me for this movie review! How stupid is that? I had to swing by a CVS store to buy one. Then, I had a buffet lunch before the show instead of having my usual movie fare of soda and popcorn.
I didn't eat that much at the buffet. Next time, I'll have to remember to unbutton my pants and loosen my belt by a notch before I step into a buffet, if only to get my money's worth!
