where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Monday, August 9th, 2010
show: 5:05 p.m.
costs: $7.50 Ticket + $4.00 small Diet/Zero ( w/ Barq's & Cherry flavors ) Coke + $1.00 2.23 oz. Emerald Trail Mix, Tropical Blend ( bought at CVS Drugstore and smuggled-in ) + $1.00 1.2 oz. Jack Link's All American Beef & Cheese ( also bought at CVS blah, blah, blah ... ) = $13.50
auditorium: 10
seat: 4th row, 8th column
synopsis: The "based on a true story" movie about the "founding fathers" of Internet Porn.
Jack Harris ( Luke Wilson ), a "problem solver", goes to L.A. to help out a friend. Before he knows it, he helps to deliver Internet Porn to the rest of the world. At first convinced that he can handle the business end of porn without any negative effect on his family life, he soon realizes that he is in way over his head as his life descends down the slimy trail of sleaze porn.
noteworthy scenes: 1.) Porn montage; 2.) Pepper; 3.) NASA; 4.) Veterinary office; 5.) Problem solver; 6.) Building permit; 7.) 15 minutes; 8.) Subscribers; 9.) Bells and whistles; 10.) Fresh stuff; 11.) Russian mob; 12.) Video; 13.) Server; 14.) Other problem; 15.) Legal advice; 16.) Sites with nondescript names; 17.) Dead Russian; 18.) Flashback; 19.) Internet billing service; 20.) Stand-off; 21.) Two million dollar check; 22.) New building; 23.) Bigger egos; 24.) AVN Awards, 2003; 25.) Rich and somebody's bitch; 26.) Old familiar face; 27.) Secret deal; 28.) Oldest story in the book; 29.) Addiction to money, sex and power; 30.) Post-orgasm silence; 31.) Race track; 32.) The lawyer; 33.) Chump change; 34.) Terrorist fans; 35.) Illegal porn; 36.) Kinky terrorists; 37.) "They simply forgot"; 38.) Problem son; 39.) Billing record; 40.) Bad news; 41.) Orgy house; 42.) The break-up; 43.) Government warning; 44.) Father/son talk; 45.) Contract back-date; 46.) Correctional facility; and 47.) Reconciliation.
audience reaction: There were just a few people in the audience--all men. And it seemed like I was the only one getting the jokes and enjoying myself---Hey! not in that way.
recommendation: Although informative and of special interest to those who want to know the history of Internet Porn, this is strictly a rental, the way porn ought to be.
spoiler alert! This is supposedly "based on a true story" so it's hard to tell fact from fiction. With that in mind, first, I wouldn't go into a partnership with mobsters. Second, I wouldn't go into a partnership with people strung-out on drugs ( because they have to "feed" that habit ). Third, I wouldn't hire the services of a lawyer who's under government investigation. Fourth, I would never get myself into a relationship with a porn star/prostitute. And, fifth, I wouldn't throw money around like there's no tomorrow. I don't know if the "dead Russian mobster and the dead lawyer situations" are true or not. But, more than likely, they aren't; otherwise, they wouldn't be included in the movie for all the world to see ( just think about the repercussions, legal and otherwise ).
fyi: I love how the government figured-out how to track down terrorists!
I remember back in 1995 when I was working as a dental lab technician and all the guys at work, it seemed, were getting caught-up in the Internet craze. A couple of them even brought their laptop user's manual to read during break periods--and they were thick books! Mind you, this was back when everything was plain ol' "Dial-Up" service. And you could use your TV set as a monitor ( Can a TV set still be used in such a way today? ). At one point, one of my co-workers told me that, to get on the Internet, you had to wait about half an hour for your computer to load-up--and you'd better hope and pray that nobody will call you on the telephone or you'd have to start all over again! Ah ... the good old days.
There's all this talk about Illegal Porn on the Internet. But you have to ask yourself this: Why don't Google, Yahoo and all the others delete such stuff and report the scumbags to the authorities? The answer is, It's all there for a reason--IT'S A TRAP!!!!!!!
word of advice: Don't buy internet porn! Otherwise, you'd become the unwitting/ unwilling victim of a "victimless crime", or end up in jail, and/or suffer the same fate as the terrorists in this movie ( Ha, ha, ha )!
Money and prostitutes have one thing in common: They have no loyalty.
tidbits: My movie watching pleasure was interrupted by a dumb-ass rude idiot who talked on his cellphone sometime during the movie. If I didn't have to write down movie notes, I would have reported him to the management. Why can't Century Cinemas have a Volunteer Monitor in place like they do at Regal Cinemas?
At Regal Cinemas, any responsible adult movie-goer can choose to be a volunteer monitor and take a paging device with him/her into the auditorium. And if anything is disrupting the movie-watching experience, the monitor can alert the management right away who will then come in to address the problem.
