where: CENTURY 14 VALLEJO in Vallejo, CA
when: Friday, July 24th, 2009
show: 12:00 pm ( extra dollar discount Morning Matinee )
costs: $6.00 Ticket + $4.25 medium Diet/Zero ( with Barq's & Cherry flavors ) Coke + $1.39 CVS Mediterranean Trail Mix = $11.64
auditorium: 7
seat: 4th row, 9th column
A female control freak clashes with a male chauvinist slob.
A TV morning show producer, Abbey Richter ( Katherine Heigl ), who's still looking for "Mr. Right," is desperate for a ratings boost. So, she reluctantly forces herself into a partnership with Mike Chadway ( Gerard Butler ), a highly-opinionated man's-Man in matters of the heart , maintaining a "vulgar civility" ( Did I just invent an oxymoron? ) for ratings' sake. In the course of events, Mike makes a deal with Abbey: He'll help her land "Mr. Right" right away or he'll quit the show. Abbey is just too happy to agree to it.
noteworthy scenes: 1.) The reference to "Volkswagens;" 2.) Low-down on a blind-date; 3.) Mike's public-access TV show; 4.) Mike's first day on the job at the TV station; 5.) Ratings report; 6.) The uncle & nephew talk; 7.) Rescued from a tree; 8.) Coached phone conversation with Dr. Colin ( Eric Winter ); 9.) "Rules of the Game;" 10.) At the women's boutique; 11.) The baseball game; 12.) The "Goodnight;" 13.) The meeting with network executives at a restaurant; 14.) SF Saloon & Grille; 15.) The Craig Ferguson Show; 16.) The elevator; 17.) The hotel room; 18.) The new set; 19.) The Hot-Air Balloon festival.
audience reaction: The audience was really entertained by this Rom/Com movie.
recommendation: I enjoyed it--I might even go see it again just to take more extensive notes. Go see it.
spoiler alert! Katherine Heigl is 5'9" but the scene with her 5'8 1/2" blind date makes her look like Hagrid's little sister.
Vibrating panties are not slipped-on like a regular pair of panties but, rather, ( ahem! ) they are "slipped-in," to put it euphemistically. Every horndog knows this fact! Why won't Hollywood make me a scene editor and save them from unnecessary embarrassment and ridicule?
fyi: This movie opened to coincide with the three-day weekend Hot-Air Balloon Festival at Solberg Airport in Readington, New Jersey.
The women's boutique scene with the dress reminded me of a joke my eldest sister shared with me years ago about the diminishing trend of women's skirts:
Pointing at her ankles: "Maxi."
Pointing at just below her knees: "Midi."
Pointing at just above her knees: "Mini."
Pointing at her crotch: "Ma'o na kini!" ( Pronounced: Maa-oo naa key-knee, which is Cebuano for "This is it." )
word of advice: Guys, when you go see this movie, take lots of notes 'cause good ol' Mike has lots of stuff to teach you!
tidbits: Speaking of pretty girls who are foul-mouthed, I remember at one time having the "hots" for this beautiful mulatta co-worker. One day, I found myself in a room with her and another co-worker, a pretty Hispanic girl. The Hispanic girl, envious of the attention that I was lavishing on the mulatta, walked up to the two of us and loudly said to me in my left ear, three times, "F-ck me!" "Ay! muy caliente, chiquita." I didn't take her up on her command right there and then, of course, but I nervously laughed, instead. The mulatta girl avoided me soon after that.
The Hispanic girl did eventually give me her nice, warm, soft and hairy pussy--NO! you perverts--a kitten. K-I-T-T-E-N. Her boyfriend went "mushroom hunting" one day and happened by a marsh at a golf course where a soaking-wet kitten was abandoned. They couldn't keep it at their apartment so I took it from them.
And, being that it was found in a marsh, I named it, Marshall. Who grew up to be one funny, curious and hyper --"strictly-indoors"-- Blotched Tabby. But this is a story perhaps best told at another time and on another blog post.
Sometimes, these days, a comedy film will have an extra scene right after the trailing credits are shown. This one's extra scene was probably edited out. So, allow me, Cine-Man, to recreate that scene here for your enjoyment:
INT: Hotel "Honeymoon Suite," nightime.
Groom: Honey, before we go on, I'd like you to put on my pants.
Bride: What?
Groom: Just do it.
Bride: But I can't wear your pants because they're too big and loose.
Groom: That's because only the man wears The Pants around the house, just so you know.
Bride: Well, then ... humor me and put on my panties.
Groom: ( trying hard ) It's impossible! I can't get into your panties!
Bride: And that's the way it's gonna be If You Don't Change Your Attitude, Mister!
The Lesson for today is this: Women change soon after they get married. And that, my dear readers, is "The Ugly Truth!"
