where: MOVIE2K.TO via STREAM2K on my laptop
when: Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011
show: 10:30 a.m.
costs: $0.00 stream
auditorium: My living room
seat: My swivel chair
2nd time
where: EDWARDS FAIRFIELD STADIUM 16 & I-MAX in Fairfield, CA
when: Friday, May 6th, 2011
show: 12:01 a.m.
costs: $17.50 Ticket + $0.00 small Popcorn ( Free on Movie Watcher Rewards Card ) + $4.75 small Zero Sprite + $1.00 3.1 oz Fudge Brownie Cookie Dough Bites ( bought at the Dollar Tree Store and smuggled-in ) = $23.25
auditorium: 12, with the I-Max screen
seat: 3rd row, 6th column
synopsis/overview: On the day that Thor ( Chris Hemsworth ) is to be crowned the successor to his father's throne, some of the Asgardians' enemies, the Frost Giants, violate the treaty by breaking into the palace to try to steal their confiscated power source. Thor launches an attack on the Frost Giants, bringing both worlds of the Nine Realms on the brink of yet another war. When his father, Odin ( Anthony Hopkins ), learns of the retaliation, he strips Thor of his powers and banishes him to Earth. Without his superhuman powers, Thor is but a mere mortal man at a crucial time when the traitor back on his home planet of Asgard is plotting his untimely demise.
noteworthy scenes: 1.) "I think that was legally your fault"; 2.) Frost Giants vs. Asgardians; 3.) "Beacon of hope"; 4.) "A wise king never seeks out war. But ... he must always be ready for it"; 5.) Intruders; 6.) "This was supposed to be my day of triumph"; 7.) Retaliatory strike; 8.) "You're an old man and a fool"; 9.) Cast-out; 10.) CPR; 11.) Tazer; 11.) "You're no match for the mighty---"; 12.) Crater; 13.) Wormhole; 14.) "I just lost my most important piece of evidence"; 15.) "I'm so sorry. I swear, I'm not doing this on purpose"; 16.) The immovable hammer; 17.) "For a crazy homeless person, he's pretty good"; 18.) "I told him"; 19.) "Master of magic"; 20.) "Innocent child"; 21.) The diner; 22.) The middle of the road; 23.) The appropriated records"; 24.) "You can bring your urgent matter to me ... your king"; 25.) The pet store; 26.) "You think me strange"; 27.) "There's always a purpose to everything your father does"; 28.) Crash site; 29.) Breach; 30.) "You're big. I've fought bigger"; 31.)Failed attempt; 32.) Book; 33.) Bad news; 34.) "He's got a visitor"; 35.) Bar; 36.) "So, you're the one who showed us the way"; 37.) "You're sworn to obey me now"; 38.) Drunk; 39.) Campfire talk; 40.) "Don't mistake my appetite for apathy"; 41.) "I'm bound by honor to my king"; 42.) "Destroy everything"; 43.) "Zena, Jackie Chan and Robin Hood"; 44.) "And I need no longer to obey you"; 45.) "Is that one of Stark's"; 46.) Street fight; 47.) "Don't worry my friends, I have a plan"; 48.) "It's over"; 49.) "Worthy"; 50.) "So, this is how you normally look"; 51.) The alliance condition; 52.) "Welcome to Asgard"; 53.) "We need you now"; 54.) King's chamber; 55.) "To prove to father that I'm a worthy son"; 56.) "If you destroy the bridge, you'll never see her again"; 57.) "I could have done it, father"; 58.) "It's gone"; 59.) "There will never be a wiser king than you, or a better father"; 60.) "There is always hope"; 61.) "She searches for you"; and 62.) Bonus Scene after the Ending Credits.
favorite scenes: I liked the smashing-the-cup-on-the-floor scene.
I liked the pet store scene.
I liked the "Is that another one of Stark's?" scene.
audience reaction: N/A. I was by my lonesome ....
2nd audience reaction: The audience--there were about a hundred of them, myself included--liked this movie. But only one gave it a "Hands Clapper" ending. I guess the rest of us were just too sleepy to care.
recommendation: I liked this movie. Go see it if you're a fan of Marvel Comic Book superheroes.
spoiler alert! Okay, I'm admittedly confused right off the bat! If Valhalla is Odin's Great Warrior Hall in Asgard where mortal human warriors go to after getting killed in combat, where did those Asgardian warriors go to after they were killed in combat fighting against their enemies, the Frost Giants? Why didn't Odin use the hammer against the "Frosties"? The best weapons to use against the Frost Giants would be anything that was red-hot--white-hot would even be better; think about it .... Once again, there were no bows and arrows used against the enemy; not even the only one that was shown! I wanted to tell the combatants, Hey, dudes, it's like, you know, the 21st century now. So, you guys better, uhmm, get on with the times and, like, seriously upgrade your stockpiles of weapons and stuff. 'Just sayin', bros .... Why did it seem that there was not a god/goddess in Asgard with the ability to perceive imminent danger? Wasn't there anybody in Asgard with the supernatural ability to perform miracle healings so that their king wouldn't have to go around wearing a stupid eye-patch? Why were there no cars passing through as they stood in the middle of the street? Those Feds sure could clean-out a laboratory rather quickly--and in business attire, no less! They have another line-of-work waiting for them when they quit being Feds: Furniture and appliance movers--and they can call themselves the "Ex-Fed" since Fed-Ex is already taken! It is implied at the outset that the Norse gods and goddesses have made trips to Earth. Therefore, Thor should have known exactly what cats, dogs and birds are. "There's always a purpose to everything your father does"--yeah, including getting old and becoming gravely ill. Ha, ha, ha. Ahh ... wait a minute ... why do the Norse gods and goddesses get old, sick and die? The two "Boiler Makers" were served-up by the bartender too quickly! There are wild boars, pheasants and cattle in Asgard? Is Asgard where such yummy-licious creatures go to after they get eaten down here on Earth? And what happens next after they get themselves eaten in Asgard? As yummy-licious as they are, I don't think that I'd want to subsist on a Wild Boar, Pheasant and Cattle diet for all of eternity. The four warriors walked 50 miles from their landing site all the way to the little town's research lab ...? The explosion at the gas station was not big enough. As they were running away, a shop window exploded, sending pieces of safety glass--not pieces of sharp and jagged glass shards--at them. He was still in human form when he was on the receiving end of that metallic back-hand. A back-hand powerful enough to send a human being flying across a considerable distance would also be strong enough to seriously damage said human's face, skull and brains ( In other words, he would be dead right-quick! ). And that back-hand was delivered to his head, not to his body. Therefore, the back-hand wouldn't have sent him flying far but would just have sent him falling to the ground rather quickly! Thor flew fast to get to the teleportation site in the desert. So, how did Thor's warrior friends, who had to ride in a vehicle, get to the site at almost the same time as he did? Why couldn't Thor, who could fly fast with the aid of his hammer, catch up to Loki who was just on horseback? When Thor flew over the bridge then switched to walking mode it was done irrespective of a Law of Physics that governs Velocity, Mass and Inertia. In other words, Thor's rapid deceleration from flying to walking was too fast to be believable--had that been me, I would have tripped all over myself and tumbled around a bunch of times; and Loki ( Tom Hiddleston ) would have died laughing! Loki's horny helmet sure took a long time to come ( pun not intended ) off. When Loki was lying down on the bridge and Thor tried to strike him with the hammer, he blocked the strike with his halberd ( polearm ..? spear ..? ) even though a later shot showed that he couldn't even push the hammer off his chest! If the hammer was too heavy for him to lift or move, then it was strong enough to crush his chest. With both of his sons' lives in great danger, did Odin really have enough time to put-on his armor, style his hair and comb his beard before dashing off to rescue them? If I were Odin, I would have gone to try and save my sons wearing nothing but my pajamas. Heck, sometimes I even go to sleep naked; so, if I were Odin, I might have even gone to try and save my sons' lives while still completely butt-naked! ( Who's your daddy ...? L.O.L. ) Since Thor is strong enough to wield the hammer, then he's many times stronger than the combined strength of a multi-planetary army of strong men--'probably even stronger than Superman, himself ( 'Sorry, DC Comics ). Thor's hammer, Mjolnir, was "forged in the heart of a dying star." Therefore, said hammer would be so super dense ( denser and heavier than the Earth's and the Moon's cores put together ) that it would have its own gravitational field which would wreak havoc on the Earth's and the Moon's gravitational fields as well as their individual orbits and spins! And when that super-dense hammer impacted the Earth, it should have caused earthquakes, tsunamis and volcanic eruptions all around the world. Thor really didn't have to do anything at all with that hammer since its gravitational field, alone, would sufficiently attract everything to it--even a particle of light would be theoretically attracted to it. That hammer would be like a portable Black Hole! ( Damn! I can be too smart for my own good at times. Woe is me. Woe is me .... ) I take it that Thor fell to Earth on a Thursday? 'Just makes sense that he would fall to Earth on that day, a Thor's day. Are the Norse gods/goddesses supposed to be immortal or are they just a race of human-like beings with super-powers and with a very long life expectancy like the Anunnakis?
And speaking of Loki, why was he short? Did he suffer from some kind of congenital disease? The movie didn't explain it.
And why are the human warriors who get killed in battle kept in Odin's "repository" in Asgard, the Great Warrior Hall of Valhalla? Is it because their gaping wounds, severed limbs and decomposing bodies are not a pretty sight to look at so, therefore, they're not allowed to mingle with the Asgard denizens, especially at dances, at other social functions and at banquets? And they can all just forget about having sexual intercourse! Hey, that doesn't sound like a warrior's paradise at all, that sounds more like hell. Ha, ha, ha.
fyi: The Internet version of this movie buffered so much that it took me almost five ( ! ) hours to watch it in its entirety.
At my now-defunct high school, Pacific High School, in San Leandro, CA, our yearbook was called, Valhalla; and our athletes were called, Vikings.
One of the scriptwriters of this movie, J. Michael Straczynski, wrote a book on how to write scripts, The Complete Book of Scriptwriting. I wrote two scripts based on what I learned from his book: One for a TV sit-com that never got produced because the show was canceled before I could even send them a copy of what I had just written; and a movie script that I personally deemed too long to translate well unto film--I'm keeping this one "on the back burner" of my mind until I can go back to it and write it out as a book manuscript.
word of advice: Temper your temper.
Don't call anyone a fool! ( Bible's New Testament, the Gospel of Matthew 5:22 )
tidbits: As I searched the Internet for this movie's advanced reviews, I came across this Pun Joke, which I reworded:
The Norse Vikings were a stinky lot! But their loved ones could easily tell them apart from each other simply by their individual characteristic smell. One Norse in particular had a very beautiful daughter whom he loved so dearly. One day, the Norse Viking had to go on a raid in a far-away land. While there, he discovered that the natives used something called "bar soap." Finally, after many years, it was time to go back home. When he arrived at his village, his daughter was nowhere to be found. The Norse accosted one of the locals and inquired of him the whereabouts of his beloved daughter. By sheer luck, the local knew just where the now-married daughter was living. So, he took the Norse to his daughter. But, alas! the daughter didn't recognize him at all because he didn't stink since he had been using bar soap all along. Sadly, the daughter asked him to leave her alone forever.
The moral of this story is ...:
You can lead a Norse ( 1 ) to the Daughter ( 2 ), but you cannot make the Norse Stink ( 3 )!
( 1 = Horse; 2 = Water; 3 = Drink )
And here's another joke that I found:
Question: What is an "Asgard"?
Answer: It is what you need to do when you're in prison!
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